Today is the first day of spring for me, as it is the first day that I’m actually going to do some yard work. Here in Michigan, the official first day of spring is really meaningless. Often times, there’s still snow on the ground. So what’s the point of it?
Nevertheless, today is the day. I’m beginning to think about my options. Uncover the outdoor furniture or pick up sticks? Clean up the leaves in the beds or edge the lawn? These are major decisions, especially since I only have a short window of time today and limited availability on the next several weekends. I need do something with some high impact.
After careful consideration, I’ve decided to attack the front yard today. I’m going to be a one-man horticultural crew this afternoon. The back yard will have to wait until another weekend. At least my neighbors and passersby will think my yard is tight from end to end. Only you and I will know the truth.
One of the dilemmas this year is what to do about lawn fertilization and weed control. The Canadians to our north, I mean south (here in Detroit), say that cosmetic lawn care is evil. I’m not sure if I want to go that far, but I am concerned about the environment. Phosphorous is out. But my lawn needs some Nitrogen, baby!
Weeds are not much of an issue for me since I’ve always stayed on top of them. Nuking the weeds is probably not the best alternative but it sure works. I know that my Canadian friends would not approve of lawn Nukes. But, for me, I think it’s the best way to annihilate a weed.
Moles are another story. If I could find them, I would kill every mole in my neighborhood. And I would not be at all remorseful. They are an underground plague sent by the demonic underworld to make me go insane. And they deserve to die.
Well, I better get to work. Let’s recap: lawn dilemmas, nuclear warfare, and death.
Oh by the way, Happy Easter!
Phil
